My Dad often
called getting old, not the “golden years” but the “rusting years” as
everything begins to get older, rustier and eventually falls apart. As I was rapidly approaching my 50th
birthday, I began to notice some wear and tear on my own frame. I didn’t think much of it until I need to
have knee surgery for a double-torn meniscus with some arthritic bone
debris. The pain at first was nothing
but an interference into my activities; I may have felt a little tightness from
minor exertion during my workout or a longer than usual walk. Within an hour or two and a couple pain
relievers, everything was fine. As time
passed, the pain became progressively unbearable. I would wake up in the middle of the night in
pain just from my knee rubbing against the other knee or if I put any amount of
weight on it. After less than an hour of
surgery, I was able to stand and put full weight on it without pain and was
able to sleep through most of the night without any major interruptions.
After much
procrastination and dwelling, I finally decided to replace my mattress. I had my current mattress for at least eight
years, perhaps more, it’s just not one of those things I really never gave a second
thought on having to replace. Only when
the mattress no longer provided me comfort for my aching frame, I decided it’s
time to retire the old and bring on the new.
Over the past year, I walked out of more stores than I want to remember
when the salesperson pretentiously knew exactly what I needed, like a predator
on his first prey after a long winter hibernation. If the salesperson’s impression of what is
perfect for me is based on his assumptions on what he saw when I walked in, they
didn’t deserve my business … and we all know what assume means. It was not even the money I was about to spend,
scaring me away as much as the salespersons who tried upselling everything by convincing of the must haves on
this year’s model and without fail managed to squeeze in the must haves of the
fully loaded extras. I think this
process went on close to a year but seemed like more before I finally had to
give in as prey to one of these predators.
As things
began to open up from the COVID-19 pandemic, along with a friend we ventured
out on a Saturday rendezvous to get out of the house a bit. I coerced him to come with me to the mattress
store, he unwillingly obliged, much like taking a beloved pet to the
veterinarian for their annual vaccines.
We pulled into the parking lot, took a couple deep breathes before going
up to the door and walking in. The
salesperson appeared to anticipate our arrival and welcomed us to their
showroom (what you and I call a mattress store). I was nervously
happy to get the older dapper salesperson thinking he may not be as aggressive
to make the sale than the younger preppy one.
The
salesperson began interrogate me on what seemed like a round of 101 questions,
mattress store style. He showed me high
end, middle range and low end in price and quality and let me pick what was
good for me, by the end, he let me take my time trying out the ones I liked. Never did he rush me, but while trying to get
comfortable, he mentioned the pros and cons of each of the five mattresses I
considered. Little did he know, I
already narrowed it down to three of them and I just wanted to try out which
was the best fit for me. The one I
picked was high middle in price and came with an adjustable base. This may ease some of my pains I get. The only thing I can’t get over is how tall today’s
mattresses are what a chore it will be to put on a fitted pad and fitted
sheets! Just never thought mattresses
required more thoughts and decisions than plush, medium, firm.
So here’s
some of the questions he threw at me…
My price
range – don’t remember the breakouts but do I want cheaper, middle ground or
expensive – or as he stated what make do I want: a Yugo, Honda, Cadillac,
Mercedes or Rolls Royce. He basically
told me to toss the Yugo and Rolls Royce.
He said the Yugo won’t last nor will it offer any relief but to my
wallet and the Rolls Royce has more features on it that you will never past the
showroom.
Let's get down to the model and trim. For
my model, I asked would I want latex, memory foam, cooling gel, hybrid, coil,
combo and for the trim do I prefer luxury plush, plush, medium, medium firm,
firm and extra firm. He had spent time
explaining all in detail and again shared the pros and cons of each one. Then he proceeded with additional options,
like optional equipment on my car. How
thick do I want the mattress and what I want for the topping and what do I have
for as a base. For topping, my choices
were pillow top, quilted top, gel top, flattop, smooth top and for the bottom
its boxspring, platform, slatts, or foam bottom or ground. I wanted standard thickness, which mind you
is probably one and half times the height of my current mattress, topping
smooth top and on a platform. I kept my
choices to accommodate my current situation to avoid any additional increase in
costs and time in the showroom. By this
point, I was getting restless and ready to leave and I am confident my friend
was already wishing he never came along.
After almost
spending what seemed like all of my Saturday there, the salesperson
acknowledged we were winding down our time together but he needs to know my
package preference and delivery options.
The package would what’s included with the mattress purchase. My choice was basic, essentials, comfort and
royal. I had to select one looking at a
grid showing what’s included in each package.
The basic just included either a mattress cover or a couple of pillows
to the platinum includes everything from the preceding lists. I opted to stay with the complimentary basic
package and chose the two pillows.
Delivery also had four options: free, bronze, silver, gold or platinum. Living on the third floor of a condominium
coupled with my lack of handyman skills, I chose the platinum package. This included removal of the old mattress,
set up of the adjustable base, placing the mattress on the adjustable base and
making sure everything is working as expected.
There is no wonder
I really kept postponing this shopping trip, it was probably worse than buying
a car. With the salesperson watching me,
I just layed prone, he continued to tell me more unnecessary details about the
mattress in a monotone voice which just about put me to sleep. This is when I hope I made the right decision
which will last me for at least five years.
Although it was the last thing I wanted to do on my weekend but glad
it’s done and hope my five to fifteen minute romp on the floor demo, hope they
remove the old as promised, deliver the new and set up the adjustable base on
my platform without causing too much second thoughts if I made the right choice
at the right time. I leave you to return to your
regularly scheduled Saturday programming … oh… as for the woman in picture …
wife/girlfriend not included.
