Dear Robb,
I can only imagine what is going through your mind, as why your forty-five year-old self is trying to tell you about what your own future holds. After all, you still have a whole life ahead and have years on your side before you become an adult. Actually, you won’t realize until much later when weeks become months and before you know it months silently slip away and become years. A quote given to me by a friend of Mom and Dad’s says it quite simply,
“Life is like a roll of toilet paper, the closer to the end, the faster it rolls…”
I couldn’t agree more. Each passing year, will pass by faster than the last, and much faster than you can ever imagine. Life is too short for you not to stop and enjoy it at every chance you get. Hell, as you read this you’ve already are really no longer the fourteen year-old teenager but a forty-five year-old grown man. Though I never, ever have lived my life in terms of regret, I am writing this letter to you, my fourteen year-old self, not as much a lesson but to help guide you through your journey. Its fine if you want to view it as me lecturing a lesson, but these are points I wish I learned from early on and not stumbled upon at random points in my life.
You will have completed 30 years of employment with one organization, the YMCA. Congratulations!!! The journey will take you through as many ups and downs as a marriage and have outlasted many one or even two time marriages. Trust me, your career will be nothing less than spectacular and filled with what many may have called a manic-depressive relationship. The most stimulating and exciting adventures will outnumber the difficult and challenging years by at least 6 to 1, pretty good odds, if you were to place a bet on it, no? Just stick through the tough times, as it will place greater value on the better ones.
As you progress through your career, you will be in a constant race over hurdles of adversity which you will have to overcome. Fortunately, there will be two friends right by your side. Meet your two new friends tenacity and resilience. Together, they will cheer for you and stand by your side. The two will help you not only build your character but will reveal your character during some of the most challenging points in your journey and will remain by your side until the very end. As you look back in the mirror of your life, you certainly wouldn’t believe the journey you’ve been through and what you will continue to tread along in the future. A wise mentor once told me:
“Yesterday is a canceled check; tomorrow is only a promissory note; but today is the only cash you have – invest and spend wisely!”
Again, I couldn’t have said it any better.
Let me introduce you to them, with some background on your friends and come to an agreement on who they are. This may be helpful for you to understand what roles they will play in your life.
· tenacity is persistent in maintaining, adhering to, or seeking something valued or desired, etc.
Tenacity will help you keep your eye on the prize through all that you dream. You may not realize, but the YMCA has helped you pursue and fund your post high school education all the way through post graduate coursework – but time and financial restraints play against you to complete the coveted doctoral degree. Tenacity will stand by you as you confront the rigorous graduate and post graduate coursework while working full-time as a program director at the YMCA and holding down a part-time job at the university as a research and teaching assistant. Life sometimes just happens to get in the way of the bigger picture, but don’t let it stop you, just let it temporarily detour you. Perhaps completing that coveted dissertation may be a goal in your retirement years, as you will be able to retire younger than most, due to the YMCA Retirement Plan. On that note, make sure you take time to pick up the phone and thank both Steve and Tom for looking out for you in on this great career advice when you talk to them! They knew the ropes early on and you benefited greatly from their own knowledge and experiences. Thank them often! Focus to nurture your career and soak up all the knowledge you can in so many aspects of being a YMCA professional has been instrumental with providing you experiences the majority can only dream about.
· resilience is the ability of something to return to its original shape after it has been pulled, stretched, pressed, bent, etc.
Resilience will test your inner strength, your closest family members and the boundaries of your friendships. Your parents will go through some life changing events which will change the course of your own life and destiny as you know it. Mom will be involved in a major automobile accident involving a drunk driver and Dad will have battled numerous health issues causing you to take on a caretaker role for both parents. Through all this time you will become their rock as they were yours as you become the adult you will become. Close friends will either physically move away or grow distant as a part of their own life’s journey. Despite these hurdles, you managed to build a career which you will have been destined to leave a legacy. With all the naysayers who did everything in their power to keep pushing you down, you have always found a way to prove them all wrong. But in the mix, you will be blessed with more than one individual, who will be like guardian angels, always believing in you, more than you believe in yourself and allows the best of you to brightly shine through the darkest turbulent storms. These angels help you without hesitation, for you to find a way to always rise above and come out stronger and with more life experiences. Here you have Irene and Ann to thank for their guidance, support and cheering you on. Thank them often!
I wish I could have given you this advice earlier, but looks to me as if you’ve pretty much mastered a life well lived. Choosing to work in a non profit is none like no other, as is no two non profits are the same. With the dynamics of various leaders, communities, participants and your own life, the unique experience you face will heavily evolve into your journey alone. Not that you will be alone, but the journey was created just for you. Don’t expect to become materialistically rich, but become intrinsically rich in your heart and wealthy in experiences with the connections you make. The financial rewards are replaced with the difference you make in the lives of people and communities. The differences in the lives of people from cradle to grave can only be measured by volumes as are the community which will have become better places to live because of contributions you made.
The YMCA may not have been your first choice for a career, nor did it ever cross your mind, nor was the non profit field, but this journey you are on will be phenomenal when you finally realize your career was born. The great part of this is the YMCAs mission parallels your own values and what you believe in. With each passing year, maybe that’s why you wear your emotions on your sleeve and get sentimental with each new cherished memory. Finding a calling early and been able to make the YMCA your life’s work will be destined to be your journey and ultimately your legacy. At times you may ask yourself “Why me?” but as the years pass, you will look back it exclaim, “Why Not!”
Who knows you may eventually write a blog about your journey. I know, what the hell is a blog… that’s another story for another time. Let’s say not only has your life evolved but so has the world around you in the last 30 years. Good luck!
I remain your 45 year-old self,
Robert W Kovacs
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